heartache

The Path of Love

Never ever fear or regret love. To love someone is a great gift to them and to yourself. We must not allow heartache to interfere with the flow of love that comes from inside us. If one cannot return your love, that is no reason to stop sending it out into the universe. Each of us carry a special kind of love and sometimes we find ourselves giving it to someone who just isn’t capable of returning it. It’s not reason at all to shut down and stop loving. You ARE love. Allow it to continue to flow, eventually it will reach someone who is capable of returning that love.

Many Blessings,
ravensig

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Matters of the Heart

Today I speak about relationships and your heart. Have you locked it down? Have you become closed off because of past hurt and pain? You must send out what you wish to be returned to you. Project love into the universe and it will be returned. Worry, fear and doubt have no place in the heart… you must allow yourself to be free to love without condition and expectation and that kind of love will be returned.

Many Blessings,
ravensig

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The Woman with a Foolish Heart

ravenatalker2015She said to him that she’s writing a story. The title, she says, is “The Woman with a Foolish Heart”. He then asks “is this a self reflection then?” She answers with a definite “yes” and then he replies with, “I presume this is past tense” and she says, “mostly” then he says something that changes her story all together. He replies with, “I challenge if it was your heart or mind that was foolish?” So this is where the story becomes changed from what she once believed to what she knows within her soul.

This woman you all must already know is me. The conversation as seen above, is real. The thoughts that filled my mind as I wrote down the title of this story were of memories. Memories of all the times my heart held out hope for a love that was real, only to become shattered with broken promises, denied love, affection and truth. I thought about my fears and prayed to Spirit to please not let me be fooled again. In writing this story it became clear… I was indeed reflecting within the mind and certainly not the heart. Memories and thoughts all coming from the mind of course… but what about my heart? What was in my heart then and what is in my heart right now? There is only one answer, “LOVE”.

The heart holds no fear, doubt, worry or anything other than love. Love is what the heart is for. With every beat there is only love within the heart. The mind would like us to “think” differently. The mind tells us to hold back when the heart says be free to love. The mind says fear is real but the heart says I love you still. This woman who thought she had a foolish heart, realized that it has always been the mind that was foolish. The heart is what it has always been and will always be… pure, unfiltered love. Just because love was given but not returned does not mean it wasn’t real.

My heart is unchanged by an unfortunate past, it still continues to love. I love more today than I have ever loved before. The past has not weaken my spirit, but made it stronger. There is a fairy tale still waiting to be written. It’s not about the knight on the white horse, about being rescued, about the castle or the ball or anything else the common fairy tale might seem. It’s about the dance of life between two people in the same agreement with their souls. Two people who compliment each other is such a way that there is balance and love that simply never ends. Two people unafraid to truly love each other and give of themselves without holding back and without condition. That is my fairy tale and I believe in it with all of my heart.

Now, I’m just going to sit here with my mouse friends next to this pumpkin and see what happens next 😉

Xxxxxxx
Many Blessings,
ravensig

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Releasing the Pain

Yesterday I was going through some photos and noticed that there was a distinct difference in my eyes from a year thenandnowago and a photo I took yesterday. I photochopped them side by side with the dates under them and posted this photo to my Facebook page. Friends were posting how I looked so much better, more alive, happier, healthier, etc. I have not lost a  single pound, I’ve not changed my diet or exercise routine… yeah that’s still non-existent at the moment .. lol.

One friend finally said “Wow, what did you do differently?”

I went internal and thought the question over for only a brief moment when the light came on and I replied “I stopped feeling like I was nothing.”

Typing those words out and seeing them on the screen in front of me… reading them back to myself out loud, I got teary eyed and in that moment I released a world of pain that had been building up inside me for a very long time.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Year of the Raven… continued

This weekend was a major moment for me. I treated myself to a weekend holiday. After work on Friday, I headed straight for the mountains, all by myself. No one to keep me company on the 4 hour drive, no one to go sightseeing with, no one to have lunch and dinner with, it was just me keeping my own company. I had several emotional moments, but gathered my senses and enjoyed myself.

I drove up without booking a hotel, I thought for a change I wouldn’t really plan a thing and just see where I landed. I got to the strip in Pigeon Forge and just picked a place to stay. I got my room key thing-a-ma-bob and I knew straight away that this would be a great trip. My room number was 111 (Number 111 signifies that an energetic gateway has opened up for you, and this will rapidly manifest your thoughts into your reality). Note to self: Stay positive! That being said, I got some sleep so I could get up before the sun to make my way up the mountain to see the sunrise.
cades cove 1
So my day starts out again without any real plans except to get up the mountain before the sunrise and drive the Cades Cove loop. My first stop, Visitor’s Center to get a map…. hmmmmm looks like the Visitor’s center isn’t open this early. No map, no problem! I just followed the signs. Found a great spot for the sunrise photo and continued to the Cove.

cades cove 3I laughed at my own silliness when I got out at the first stop and grabbed nothing but a sweater to keep me warm on the mountain where it was 25 degrees and a long walk to the abandoned cabin I was headed for to take photos. The crows were laughing at me too. They surrounded the field as I made my way up the path and cawed back and fourth to each other. I nodded my head and said.. I know, I know…. not a smart decision! It’s wasn’t my first and I’m sure it won’t be my last.

I ran into a fellow photographer at the cabin and showed her my crystal ball trick then took her camera to get a shot of her in the beautiful surroundings… we ran into each other at several places along the rout in Cades Cove and each time exchanged where the best view points were. I really enjoyed being out on that mountain top, even all by myself. I realized that I wasn’t ever really alone. I could hear the voices of all my friends cheering me along, I felt their love and caring thoughts and all of their support. They weren’t physically there, but I felt their spirit with me.
cades cove 2
There were deer everywhere you looked, frost covered everything and made it look like a winter wonderland. I was in my own little piece of heaven. At one spot in the Cove I encountered an amazing amount of Eastern Bluebirds. Oh my goodness, they were so beautiful and everywhere! The wind would blow through the trees and the frost would float down just like snow. The vibrant colors of the bluebirds stood out again the white landscape. It was like a scene from my very own fairy tale. BEAUTIFUL! I knew I was right where I was meant to be. My spirit sang out loud how happy it was to be there in this place of beauty.

The stress that was once inside me, gone…. the loneliness I had been feeling for so long, gone… the heartache that follows me around like a shadow, not gone but definitely healing. I stood on that mountain looking at the valley below and the voice inside me said, “You’ve got this!” I let everything else go and enjoyed every moment of my holiday alone.

To check out the photos I took … click here and visit my Facebook Photography Page, Life Through Raven Eyes.
cades cove 4

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

What If…

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What if it’s going to be okay?
What if life isn’t really over?
What if the tears stop falling?
What if I stop reliving the past?
What if my heart becomes whole again?
What if the pain just stops?
What if the bad memories no longer haunt my sleep?
What if smiles and laughter take over?
What if I’m not scared anymore?
What if this hurt becomes nothing more than a memory?
What if I’m going to be okay?
What if love comes calling again?

What if……

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

He Loves Me… He Loves Me Not

WP_20140518_012-4I just had an interesting conversation with the clerk at the grocery store and must share:

I was checking out when some lady began speaking to my cashier in some other language that I certainly did not understand at all. My cashier replied back and the conversation went on for some time. It ended and my cashier said to me, she said that I (the cashier) should find someone, that it must be lonely being single and alone. I just stood there listening. She then said, I don’t want a boyfriend, boyfriends leave you and break your heart, I just want to find a husband and then love him. She said, husbands don’t leave you, so husbands don’t break your heart. Okay, now she has my full attention and I replied, husbands do sometimes break your heart as well. She looked at me and asked, How? I said, well, husbands leave you too. She said, not in my country, we don’t believe in divorce. To divorce in my country it is shameful, if a woman divorces she could be killed and if not the family will not take you back either because they are ashamed. I said to her, well then I hope he loves you back and she replied with, if he doesn’t then I will just pitty him. She finished ringing me up and I wished her luck.

On my drive back home I kept thinking about the conversation. It rolled around and around in my head. I pondered the pros and cons of her belief. Those who don’t believe in divorce sounds like a promising situation …. unless….. one of the people is mean, hurtful and nasty to the other in some way, what about being eternally married to someone who is abusive?… certainly not my idea of happily ever after. Divorce is not fun either and I don’t think anyone goes into a marriage thinking that somewhere down the line a divorce will be in their future…. but it happens.

My mind then went to her worry of being heartbroken. She doesn’t want a boyfriend because she is fearful of falling in love with someone who could leave her and break her heart. In my own life I have had my heart broken many times and it sucked every single time… but also in between all of those heartbreaks were moments of great love. The big question is would you give up those moments of love to keep your heart from ever being broken?

No matter how horrible and painful those heartbreaks may have been, I certainly wouldn’t want to give up those moments of love. To think about living my life with the possibility of never knowing or feeling love is far scarier than worrying about getting my heart broken. Your heart will mend but not without love.

Those moments of love are what get me through the times when love is absent. It makes me very sad to think about never experiencing those moments. Don’t be afraid of heartbreak… you should never be afraid to love and be loved.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

What it’s like in the storm

Edited in Nokia Glam MeSearching for words to say … and I can’t find anything. It’s like … a run down house in the middle of no where that has been long abandoned … no one is there and hasn’t been for a very long time. The weeds have taken over and decay has set in… seen to the world as an eyesore… just left to rot.

Needing some major weeding to be done and some tlc. It’s been a really long time since I have felt like me, wondering if I’ve ever been me. Feeling very lost, alone and afraid of the unknown. Angered at my fragility. Hating that I fall to pieces at the drop of a hat. I shake from the inside out, through the day and I don’t know how to make it stop. Trying to keep my mind occupied on other things but suddenly overcome by reality and I fall to pieces once again. Questioning my existence and why I chose this life. What is all this pain for? Where is the bright side that everyone says is there? Trying my best to keep my eye on the horizon, hoping to see the light that always shows up just after the storm. Giving myself a pep talk every few minutes. I can do this, I am stronger than I feel, I will make it beyond this point, I will get through this storm.

I write this not for sympathy or any of the like, but to help myself heal, saying out loud what is going on inside, for so long I have kept my feelings bottled up, placing my focus on the happiness and well being of others. It’s my turn now and there is a lifetime of healing that needs to be done.

Many Blessings,

ravensig

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