negativity

Moving Out of the Darkness

It’s time to pack your bags and move yourself out of the darkness! It’s time to start looking for solutions and possibilities and stop dwelling on all the things that may be wrong in your life. We have a journey to take and sitting in that dark place in your path isn’t getting you anywhere! It’s time to start moving forward!

Many Blessings,
ravensig

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Feeling Less Than…

Many people will try and drag you down and make you feel less than. Mostly this is done so that they can feel better about themselves. Don’t allow those people to stay in your life. Their negativity toward you is not about you, it is about them. You have the power to do great things. You can transform your life. You are not less than anyone else, so don’t allow others to make you feel that way.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Reminding Ourselves of the Light

WP_20140925_007For a while there I had allowed someone to make me feel less than what I am. I lost the light that is inside me. It was still there, NOTHING will get rid of it, but… I lost it. I let doubt in and I could not see my own light for the veil of doubt in front of it. I think a lot of us do this from time to time. We allow life situations and unhealthy relationships to cloud our light and we forget for a moment who we really are and what we are capable of.

It is a great feeling though, when we are able to see past that veil of doubt and wall of negativity and we regain sight of our light. In that moment, we are filled with a fire that seems unstoppable. There isn’t anything that could bring us down or get in our way of reaching our goals and ambitions. Realizing our own light is empowering! We must work hard to keep sight of that light and stay on guard to protect it from being lost in a cloud doubt and negativity that others try to plant inside us.

People like that aren’t needed in your life, the right people will help you shine that light and fan the flames of your fire. The right people aren’t afraid of your light, they will happily join you, creating a bigger beam.

Remember this: Your light is always there… only sometimes it is clouded by muck. Grab a broom and sweep it away! Let your light shine!

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Finding the Light

WP_20140616_010I woke up this morning with no idea what I was going to talk about today, so I have been throwing all kinds of topics around in my head. None of these seemed to be the topic of the day. For a moment I thought, oh well I may not have a blog to post today and then life happened.

My co-workers started making their way into the office and I felt my thoughts falling into a big ol’ bucket of negativity as they began all their banter with each other and interrupting the peace and tranquility I’ve had so far this morning. I thought to myself, “Wow! I really might be anti-social today”. I stepped outside to get away from the noise for a moment and I thought, this is a good time to take my daily sky watch photo.

Stepping outside, I found not a cloud in the sky… only sunlight and blue skies. Great, but kind of boring from a photography point of view. Heavy sigh. So as I was feeling more relaxed and walking around, I looked up and saw the sunlight twinkle in and out of the crape myrtle flowers blowing in the wind and my thoughts were instantly lightened. I took my phone out and started snapping photos, trying to catch the light as it was peeking through the branches. It was a fun, playful experience… dancing with the tree, the sun and the wind. Finally I caught it!! I caught the light!

You see today’s message is a simple one. “There is light where you choose to see it.”

I am now out of my anti-social pit of negativity and in a more positive frame of mind.

Thank you Spirit and thank you to the sun and the wind for the playful dance beneath the crape myrtle tree.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Abusive People

crow and mockingbirdThis morning I was reading a post by a friend, she spoke about a dream she had that her mother was in. It turns out that her mother was a very angry, negative and abusive person. In the dream, my friend had hoped that her mother might apologize or at least show some remorse for what she had done. That, of course never happened.

I have thought about what I could say to ease the pain of that friend and had a realization that I hope helps many. You see, I know a lot about abusive people, as I have been around them far more than I like to reflect upon. I had an abusive spouse that was abusive in every way that one could be. I grew up with a mother that never saw the sunshine, only the rain. Her entire life revolved around pain and misery and she was more than happy to spread it around. Let’s not forget those abusive friendships, abusive work relationships/encounters, etc.

So, while pondering what words of advice I could give to help my friend move past this pain, I began to think about all the abusive people I’ve encountered in my lifetime. It all really came down to something so simple and true.

All the pain, misery, abuse and negativity that comes from someone is because of them. It is not because of you or anything you have done. It is not any failing on your part, but on theirs. People are angry, abusive, negative, and hurtful because of themselves and their own past. They were not born this way but somewhere down the line they allowed themselves to become it.

You are not the root of how they behave… You were just simply there. 

The best way to let it all go is to forgive them for not being able to rise above their own history and become something better than what has happened to them. Forgive yourself for allowing their issues to get inside your own head and cause you pain. Forgive and let it go. Holding on to the pain doesn’t make them any better a person, it doesn’t change what they did or what they will do in the future. It changes nothing. It holds you back from moving forward and from finding your own peace. Let it go. Forgive.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Let the Light in

holly light

When feeling out of sorts .. step outside into the sunlight and soak up some good ol’ vitamin D from our dear friend the sun and allow it’s energy to fill and recharge you from head to toe!

Take off your shoes and place those bare feet on the Earth for grounding … let the wind blow through your hair and the sun fill your being. Take in Mother Nature’s gift with all your senses and let go. Let Go!

Let all those things that weigh you down, be taken away. Allow yourself to be emptied of all negativity so that you make way for better things to come.

Let go!

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

The Negativity of Others

mockingbirdYuck Yuck Yuck … that’s what I say when it comes to the negativity that others project. Some people just give off a negative vibe … maybe they have reason and maybe they don’t.  I use to worry about it and I use to want to try and fix it and I’ve also been known to think their negativity was about me… it turns out that some people are just negative. Nothing less, nothing more.

Don’t let yourself get sucked into the negative field of others. Let their negative vibe stay with them. Remove yourself from their space and leave them with their own energy to deal with.

We have no way of knowing why certain people give off all that negativity and just maybe it’s not our problem. They have to deal with their own energy just as we have to deal with ours.

It’s hard not to get sucked into their field … especially when you work with them or have to deal with them on a daily basis in one way or another. Just remember the energy coming from them has nothing to do with you. You can’t control what they send out .. only what you send out.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Embracing the Light

embracing the lightIn a world full of all kinds of trouble … it’s not always easy to “Embrace the Light”.

Worries, fear, sorrow, loss, stress, emotions, etc… so many troubles that can suck the light away from us.

It’s necessary that we take time often to remove ourselves from these troubles and look toward the light… the good life has to offer us. Otherwise, we get sucked into a black hole of negativity that does nothing to help us along our journey.

Today’s post is a simple reminder to take time to reflect on the good in life… just don’t stay in reflection so long that you miss out on the now.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Change Your Focus

spring bloomsNot every day can be lollipops and giggles… but no matter what life is throwing at you,  there is beauty to be seen. The negativity in a day is in reality just a small part of our life. It will pass soon and we will look back and wonder why we stressed so much over that tiny little moment of our lives. During those moments of stress, hardship and despair it’s extremely difficult to see anything other … but if we can manage if even for a moment to change our focus … we may be able to also gain some perspective on that moment.

Seeing obstacles for what they instead of how they make us feel at that moment…  feelings of dread, fear, sorrow, anger, etc  dissipate more quickly and the situation becomes more manageable.

How to do this?

Stay aware. Be open to seeing every thing in life with more than one point of view. Make a conscience effort daily to integrate this way of seeing into your life. Take each moment as it comes and if possible find a way to step back from that moment that brings you such stress and anxiety to reflect on what is real and what is made up with emotions.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Clearing Energy

candleHave you ever had one of those days where everything seems to get to you? It feels that everything that got added to your to-do list was a burden and with each task you felt more and more weighed down. You can feel the negativity building inside you. How do you get past this and how do you clear yourself of this bad energy?

I use a few techniques: 

Smudge  – Smudge is a mixture of herbs that are used just for their properties of clearing away bad or negative energy. You light them and let them smolder.. swirling the smoke around your space.. clearing away all that mad mojo.

Light a Candle – As I light the candle I imagine all the negativity inside and around me burning away and as the candle burns it continues to burn away all that bad, icky stuff.

Meditation – Take a few deep breaths… close your eyes… let go of everything … imagine all good energy taking over as you breathe in and all bad energy leaving you as you exhale.

Step Outside – Nature is a great way to get away from bad energy… just stepping out onto the ground  – taking in fresh air can be very helpful.

If none of the above work… SCREAM! LOL… seriously if you are able to do it .. sometimes a good shout out can release you from all that pent of negativity.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Dealing with Hate

hollydarksmallIn my life, I have been told many things. Negative thoughts, words and actions have come my way more than I’d like to say.

I’ve been told I was nothing and that I would never be anything.
I’ve been called names, names that are too hurtful to repeat.
I’ve been made fun of.
I’ve been pushed around.
I’ve been bullied.
I’ve been ignored.
I’ve been beaten.
I’ve been over-looked.
I’ve been pushed aside.
I’ve been taken for granted.
I’ve been stalked.
I’ve been abused.
I’ve been made to feel worthless.

I’ve been hurt in many ways but here I am.

I stand here with a smile upon my face and love in my heart… despite those who have tried to take me down. I won’t lie and tell you it hasn’t been hard. There were many times I just wanted to give up and disappear. Something inside me said… this is not you and this is not how it will end. Something inside me said I was far more than others would have had me to believe. I took that little voice and held it close to my heart and allowed myself to believe that I was more and that I would rise above what had been said and done to me.

I’m sure that my struggles are far from over … just as I’m sure that I’m a fighter and a survivor in this life and I’m not done yet.

For all of those going through the struggles of life .. I’d like to say .. don’t give up … believe in yourself. Don’t let others get you down and don’t for one minute believe in their negativity. There will always be someone wanting to make you feel less than simply because they themselves feel less than. Get yourself away from those kind of people. Their opinions and actions reflect who they are and have nothing at all to do with who you are.

You are who YOU decide you are !

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

I am Unworthy

Tsk Tsk Tsk… this statement is the most damaging of all. The negative thoughts you put into your head about yourself, stop you dead in your own tracks. Your growth physically, mentally and Spiritually is halted with every negative thought you imprint upon yourself.

I see it every day … friends saying things like: “I can’t” , “I don’t know how”, “I’m afraid”, “I don’t have the skills”.. how about not talking and pointing out what you can’t or think you can’t do and instead focusing on the things you are good at and the things you CAN DO!

Stop talking down about yourself to yourself and others!

Work on improving the areas that need improving while showcasing the talents you have already mastered. This will boost yourself confidence and help your personal growth.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Letting the words of others interfere

A while back I had taken off the story of how I got my name (Raventalker) from the About section of every site that I am on. I had read a terrible bit of crap on a website that made fun of my story. They took it a step further  and even said that they would be embarrassed if they had gotten their name as I had received mine. They went on to say something along the lines of me just being some sort of jabbering fool.

Now, I know the truth and those that follow me, know the truth. These people don’t have a clue  of who I am and don’t even follow me at all. They had simply seen my story because of my association with someone else that they didn’t like for whatever their reason was and suddenly I was grouped in their online attack.

So why did I remove my story? I didn’t remove it for months.. but then one day I thought about their attack and wondered how many others have read their attack and worried about how they (unknown web readers) would then view me. I changed my bio and left out my story. I didn’t want anyone to think I was portraying myself as a full blood of any kind.  I never said anywhere that I was I only stated how I received my name. It wasn’t what I wrote that gave that impression, it was an assumption made from some unknown ball of negativity that felt the need to attack anyone they didn’t like.

I’m normally not one to worry about what others think of me. I’m still not worried. It wasn’t what that one person thought, it was what they were leading others to think that bothered me most. That’s why I changed my bio. Well, you know what??? SCREW THEM! I have put my story back into my bios! I am proud to carry my name. I am honored about how it came to be and I will continue to honor it.

Don’t let the words of others take away from who you are. What people often say is a reflection of them and not you. (Thanks Mystical Heart Spiritual Center for the quote)

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Our Teachers

ravenQuote from Eat, Pray, Love “Accept that everyone you meet in life is a teacher”.

I was thinking about this statement and for a moment and began to reflect back on various people that have come and gone in my life and what I might have learned from each of them. Even those who came and left in a moment there was something to be learned. It doesn’t matter the length of time someone is in your life, they all offer something to be learned. Here are a few examples of my own:

  • The beggar on the street teaches us that everything we have can be gone in a flash. Cherish what you have every moment that you have it.
  • Those we teach remind us of how important knowledge can be.
  • Children show us the wonders of the world and how imagination, wonder and magic live in every moment that we allow it to be.
  • Those “Happy” folks that are always smiling, always cheerful – teach us that life is what we make it.
  • Those unhappy people who are always negative, always gloomy, always complaining – they make us appreciate the good days. They make us glad that we are not them!
  • Mothers show us what unconditional love looks like.

These are just a few examples of what we can learn from others.. the list is never-ending. Today I ask that you look at the world you live in and the people in it, a little bit differently. Ask yourself what lessons can be learned and how that person has influenced your life today.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Daily Insight – Futility

Daily Insight – Futility – Oct. 17

Negative thoughts and behaviors are usually hang-ups from our past. You need to understand that these things have nothing to do with you current situation. You must be careful not to let these behavior patterns dominate your life. Remember that what you send out, comes back to you. If you are sending out negative thoughts about yourself even, guess what comes back to you. If you fear everything then guess what you are sending out… the more you fear the more there is to fear. It is a never ending loop of chaos and drama.

Take a look today at your behaviors, actions, reactions and thoughts. Understanding exactly what it is you are sending out to the world is one of the first steps toward a better you.

Many Blessings for a great day,
Go la nv  Ga wo ni ha

It’s NOT Okay!

I wrote this several years ago…  and you know.. I STILL find myself saying this …  not as much .. but I still do say it even tho I don’t mean it. Personal or professional life.. we all do this in one way or another.

It’s OK

… how often do you find yourself saying this???

Someone does something intentional sometimes and most times not. It leaves you with  bad feelings in one way or another and you say .. “It’s ok”.

But is it really ok?

What do you do with those feelings you are left with?

Are you able to manage them away? Do you just bury them deep inside you..  in that place where we often place the things we don’t want to deal with .. or don’t know how to deal with .. or are afraid to deal with?

I find myself so often saying this little phrase… as small as it is … it can be very damaging inside.

Not sure how to stop myself from just saying “it’s ok”. Being the kind of person that I am, always wanting to please others and not make anyone feel bad .. wanting to fix all that is wrong with the world. How do I stop myself from saying “it’s ok” and still not feel guilty for possibly making someone feel bad because of it?

Another question in saying that is why is it “I” feel guilty about telling someone it’s NOT ok  and that I am hurt or feeling negative from whatever it was that happened? Especially when I am speaking about something the other person did or said .. because that is the reason we say “it’s ok” to begin with. Telling them not to worry about their words or actions. Telling them not to worry that their words or actions may be causing pain to another.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm .. oh dear ..  it looks like I have opened yet another can of worms inside myself.. now how to work it all out and learn from it and heal myself from all the many years of saying “it’s ok”.

and …..

Will the day ever come that I will find myself not ever HAVING to say “it’s ok” ???

I guess only time will tell .. but I’m certainly not holding my breath…lol

I’d DIE! lol

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

Wisdom from the walking trail

It’s all about frame of mind… 

Whatever you do …. if you decide before you do it that you hate it or will hate it then it’s probably not going to be an enjoyable experience for you. (This isn’t always true.. but mostly true.. there are always those exceptions 🙂

If you set your mind to be open to the task.. then who knows.. you may end up liking it or at the least .. not minding it so much.

I started out in my most recent “battle of the bulge” thinking that adding a workout to my already busy day was just going to be that much more work for me… it made just getting to the gym a real chore… talking myself into going and not giving up all the way home up until I actually stepped foot into the gym and then from there I would have to talk myself into staying on the bike while I was there just to get through the whole workout.

Then suddenly a funny thing happened somewhere between getting there.. being there and finishing my workout…. My thoughts went from dread to I now look forward to my workouts! How can that be??????

Well I wasn’t going to give up on the workouts .. it is my mission this time around to win this battle… and so I might as well try my best to find a way to like what I’m doing. So I did! I found something in the gym that I absolutely love .. that would be the swimming and the sauna .. hee hee LOVE IT! I save that for last .. I go in do my rounds with the weights .. do my 30 minutes of cardio and then my reward is there waiting every time.. time to swim .. which is also a great workout so there’s an extra benefit to me.. and then after swimming as many laps as I can handle .. off to the sauna I go.. there is my meditation time.. time to just sit and relax and sweat off a bit more weight at the same time.

So now it’s so much easier to get through my workouts .. so much easier to get to the gym .. and all in all I feel better.. I don’t have that looming dread hanging over me at the end of my day.

As soon as my thoughts changed from negative to positive .. everything clicked and my world became a whole lot brighter. This was something I needed to do regardless of how I thought about it so I might as well turn it into something enjoyable.

I’m lucky that my thoughts changed so quickly .. just 5 weeks into my battle.. if only they had changed years ago maybe I wouldn’t have such a large battle.. but that’s in the past and for now I’m concentrating on each day as it comes.

Message of the day:

When you have a task before you and you’re feeling that dread … look around and see if there is a way to see the positive and embrace that part of it.. even if it’s something small.. a little bit of positivity goes a long way!

Many Blessings,
Raventalker