Inspired by a video that my dear friend Olivia Kemp posted on my Facebook wall this morning.. I feel drawn to write a bit about rebuilding. Rebuilding ourselves.
Okay Olivia .. you asked for it .. so here it goes!
Life can be harsh and people even more so. For those who have been bullied as children and adults… it’s not just school age children that play the part of the bully. The bully can be a school mate, a spouse, a parent, a boss, a co-worker or even a stranger. The damage left behind from the torment that a bully lays upon us can be life changing, devastational and ever so difficult to get over and move past.
Once we have been able to remove ourselves from this destructive person, we have to then start working on the rebuild. We must find a way to repair and rebuild ourselves and the damage that has been done to our heart, our mind and our soul. We don’t want to continue carrying around with us this pain, so we must work to rid it from our lives.
Step 1 is understanding that the things that were said were not about you .. it was always about them. The acts that were done to you was not about how good or bad you are but how they felt about themselves.
Step 2 is understanding that no matter how great you were, how much you loved the other person, the kindness that you tried to show them or anything that you did or did not do .. it wasn’t and still isn’t your place to change them or heal them. They must find the change and healing within themselves.
Step 3 is understanding that you have value. No matter what was ever done or said to you by another.. you DO have value.
Step 4 is knowing who you are and who you aren’t. ( you aren’t a doormat, you aren’t bad, you aren’t the names someone else calls you, you aren’t the pain they are fighting)
Step 5 is to continue growing, learning, living, loving and understanding yourself.
Step 6... keep walking forward.
Step 7 … smile, for you are of great value and you are a survivor!
I hope this blog finds you all well and on the way to recovery..