When I was a child, I remember being happy for no reason… I was just happy or was it that I wasn’t particularly unhappy… hmmmm, definitely something to ponder. Somewhere along the way I lost my own happiness. I don’t know how, I don’t know when. All I know is that somewhere along the line I started looking to others to help me find happiness. I think most, if not all of us do this. Not sure there is an age when this happens or any particular event… it just seems to happen. I’m not saying there aren’t events in our childhood that help push this along, because I know a lot of tragic things happen through our lives at all ages. I’m just saying that somewhere, somehow… we all reach this point.
We spend much of our time looking to others to create our happiness. Whether it be our parents, spouses, children, friends or even strangers… somewhere down the line we forget how to be happy on our own and feel that we can’t be happy unless this person does that, or behaves like this or whatever. When we were younger I don’t recall ever “needing” anything to be happy.. I just was. So why in our adult years is it so hard to find that again?
I know that happiness starts within and for the most part I am able to live in many happy moments… sometimes the old ways still creep up on me and I find myself unhappy because I’m looking for someone else to make me happy. It’s just a behavior I’ve taught myself unknowingly and a behavior I try hard to break. It’s that moment of realization about what I’m doing and why that then turns my sadness around and I begin again to feel happy just because I am and I deserve it.
Here’s to hoping you all can find your own happiness inside and here’s hoping I keep breaking that chain of behavior when it starts to creep up again!