Lately I have had big problems sleeping. My mind doesn’t stop going over and over what I’ve recently been through. I’m ready to let it go but mind seems to disagree when I try to go to sleep.
I keep trying meditation and focusing on others things but nope my brain says lets go back over here … I say noooooooooo I don’t want to go back over there … and my brain says like it or not here we go!
I want to be past it so bad and while I am awake I feel that I am okay for the most part, except for the occasional thought that usually comes unexpected and causes a brief meltdown. I go to bed NOT thinking about it and suddenly BAM! There it is like Groundhog Day, rerunning over and over through my mind. I try shifting my thoughts, I try focusing on other things, nothing seems to be helping right now.
I decided I had to go a step further to rid myself of these haunting images and thoughts. I did a little unbinding ceremony. I took a piece of ribbon (in this case I used black, thought it was most fitting), I tied it on both ends. One end I imagined it being me and the other end my ex. I smudged the ribbon, I asked that we be untied in all ways for the better of everyone involved. I wanted to unbind myself from him so that I could let the haunting memories and destructive thoughts go. I severed the ribbon in half and burned each end before the knots so that we were fully separate. My heart and soul no longer tied to the hurt and pain. I cried for a moment and let it all go.
Last night was the first night in months that I didn’t have any of those memories and thoughts running through my head all night long. The torment that is caused when you can’t get something like this out of your mind, can be so damaging. I was actually able to sleep and dream of other things. The relief that was given to me, priceless. Heavy sigh of relief. I had tried so many things and nothing helped. Sometimes we have to create a physical act for our minds to truly grasp the end and allow us to completely let go.
(Please always make sure that when doing these type of ceremonies that you do them with love in your heart and the best intentions for everyone involved.)