It is the winter solstice and it has completely slipped my mind. My work day was so very busy and I was doing good just to stay focused and on task to get everything I needed to do done. I leave work and it is dark and raining. I finally get home and right away as I step inside, I feel different. Unsure of where that feeling is coming from but I say out-loud to myself, I’m not sitting at the computer tonight, tonight I will rest.
Instead of going to the sofa to relax, I sit down at the computer that I just told myself that I wasn’t going to sit at… lol and catch up with my love. Instantly I am feeling the wolf’s energy and do a search for wolf soul to see what I can find that calls to me. I find a few things and post my favorite and then notice someone else post about the solstice. That’s it! I laugh to myself for a moment as I began to realize what was going on.
Every solstice for me has been about a night of rest. I am always busy… doing, creating, working and taking care of everyone.The solstice has always been that one night of the year that I just naturally relax, step back from everything else and join up with my wolf spirit.
Tonight, however, I have a feeling won’t be like any of the solstice nights before. What makes this solstice night different is that I now know my wolf by name …. not just in spirit.
As I type these words out on the screen before me and tell you the story of me and my wolf spirit… tears begin to flow and another realization is made.
Let me first tell you about the many solstice nights before this one. Those nights I was always physically alone but never really alone. Those were the only nights in my life that I felt as one with another. It might sound quite sad and a bit mad that my loneliness wasn’t comforted by another physical being but by a spirit. The spirit of a wolf. It was always the same wolf that would come to me on each solstice during ceremony. The wolf would come in and wrap himself around me as I slept and we would spend that long, long winter night with our hearts beating as one and for that night I would feel whole and completely at peace for I knew I was loved completely and unconditionally.
So, what makes this winter solstice different? I now know this wolf by name and he isn’t only in spirit. He is real. When I first saw him, my spirit knew. Every feeling that filled my being was so familiar and it was all I could do to contain my excitement. It was as if I knew him and not just like someone you meet and it feels like you have known each other before… it was even more than that. It was a knowing that went deeper than any words could ever relay. I didn’t just know his spirit.. I knew him .. inside and out. I knew his touch and the sound of his heart, I knew his voice and his ways, I knew what he sounds like when he’s just waking up and that wolfy yawn of his, I knew his kindness and his gentle touch, I knew his strength and the warmth of his embrace, his laughter and that chuckle that always makes me smile and the different sighs he makes… the ones when he’s tired and the ones when the distance is unbearable. I knew it all in that moment when I first saw him. Silly me thought I was drawn to him to give him a message but my spirit knew the truth and it didn’t take long at all before we both realized that same truth.
So that, my friends, is what will make THIS winter solstice night very different than all the rest and the way the Universe is working right now… next year’s winter solstice will be off the charts!
Tonight, remember that there is much time in this life to be busy .. to gather … to hunt and to prepare for many things. You must remember that to be at your best and to keep your strengths at their height… you must also take time to rest… completely let go and allow yourself time to rejuvenate.
If in the night you hear some mysterious howling … it’s just me and that wolf celebrating our love and the return of the sun.